A relationship severed

Sitting down she gave him an angry look. For the past three years he promised he would ask her to be his girlfriend. At the very same table sat a strange looking man in full alien armor. The man looked just like an ex sex buddy of hers from her days in college. Only there was something completely off about this dude who looked like he did a lot of weight lifting and had just ripped the door nob off the door with little to effort. He was also about the size of a door. The guy, or look alike had a fucking tail like a monkey. Looking at the dude's armor it was clear he was not from their own world. His would be interest or whatever people called them folded her arms. She looked pissed off and said nothing. All he wanted was to look at those huge melons of hers.

Behind her was a taller version of her who had the same sized breasts. This woman happened to be this dude's wife who also had a tail, but donned a casual dress. Both of them showed their powers and how strong they were. All he could think of now was there were saiyans in their universe. He was freaking out in his head wanting to run out of the house. She was hoping something would actually happen and a relationship would form. Her hopes were shattered when she discovered he was still in touch with his ex wife. There was no way out of this. His butt was told to shut up and tell her the truth or his balls would be smashed by another guy who looked like her ex buddy. However this one had a large scar on his face. He was in the corner of the room. According to his ex they were getting married tomorrow like he promised.

Another busty chick with purple skin entered the house and almost spilled some beans when scar face covered her mouth. He muttered something in some weird language but she waved him off. The purple chick walked to the table and gave the two other women a kiss. Each one embraced her like they were sisters or something. In his mind he was trying to remember her name. His ex wife now fiance Tiffany was a name he could remember any day of the week. Yet she lived in Georgia most of the time whereas he hung out with this cosplay chick who had some melons on her. Her name escaped him every second and she had to remind him of that every week. Acting like a friend would he promised to remember that name. To her misfortune he did not remember her name.

"Okay so you said to your ex wife that you would get back together. Why would you waste Eva's time if your sorry ass was seeing your ex again?" the taller version of Eva demanded from him. He almost crapped his pants he saw her levitate again. This woman's eyes glowed red and her teeth were gritting.

Eva was trying to hold back tears and looked away at the table. The purple chick wrapped her arms around her like any mother would muttering something in French. He thought he heard her ex boyfriend's name in French, which sounded a little more like English. Her ex's look alike was named Bob or Boromir Denson. His wife was named Jessica-Rebecca Darkmare Denson. All the names came at him like a whirlpool even the other look alike who was known as Jack came at him like a monkey. Whoever the Jack dude was he was devious, and appeared more like a rogue thief.

"I uh, .." he tried to find the words to speak, but he could not.

"You like a turd decided to play with her feelings. Seth is the only man who ever showed her any love back in college. It is unfortunate he does not recall any of what they did. However it is also clear you lied to her and your ex wife?" The dude who called himself Bob questioned him.

"Oi mate, could you oh bad timing sorry!" the Jack figure came in the room only to get a glare from everyone except Eva who was literally crying.

"WHY THE F#%K DID YOU LIE TO ME ALL THOSE YEARS!"  Eva screamed at him with rage in her voice. Tears streamed down her cheeks. It was as if the Jack figure did not exist at this moment.

"You, you do realize he is uh stealing stuff back there? I uh-" he tried to speak but was cut off.

"DO NOT CHANGE THE SUBJECT! DON'T EVEN THINK YOU CAN WEASEL YOURSELF OUT OF THIS LIKE YOU DID WITH MY DAD AND MY MOM!" Eva yelled again only to get held back by the purple chick and Rebecca Denson.

"I just, I don't know." he tried to explain in the worst way possible. Greg scratched the back of his plum head. He was trying to get out of this.

"Our world, in our world you would have been whipped through the streets and tossed into the sea with a stone tied to your legs. The only thing that would save if you had children to look after." Bob told him with a straight face that said he was telling the truth.

"You mean Earth is not alone?" he asked feeling himself pee all over himself.

"Now it is either your ex-wife or Eva. You can go to this wedding or you can call your ex and call off the wedding." Bob said to him. None of the others mentioned anything. Eva stood up from her chair. The purple chick and Rebecca let go of her. She walked up to him and gave him a slap across the face so hard that he collapsed on the floor. Where did she get that strength? How was she this angry?

"Get out of this house! This-this is no longer my home! I, j-just I just lo-lost my bff to a drink you gave her. SHE IS DEAD, I WILL NEVER EVER SEE HER AGAIN. NOW I NEVER WANT SEE YOUR FAT ASS AGAIN!" She yelled at him.

Greg got up on his feet with no help. He walked out of the room and out of the door. Eva's cries could be heard behind him as he exited her house which her bff never paid the rent for in months. No thanks to that Eva had to sell this house and would be homeless for a short while. Their relationship if anyone could call it that was ended by a group of aliens who look just like humans. 

That One Gatekeeper

She dismounted from her steed just a few meters from the gate. As her feet landed on the hard surface she closed her eyes taking a deep breath. Her gaze did not even meet the gate itself. Hesitation was all she could do when going to this one gatekeeper. Every other gatekeeper were either asleep, absent, preoccupied with another hero or party of adventurers while they try to gain access to the Netherworld. It had other names as many religious zealots, wizards, and fanatics would label this part of their world. To some these gates lead to portals to other worlds or the Black Abyss, and the Dark world that is supposedly the underworld and the world of nightmares.

Hillda Newhart the Court Bard's Bastard Daughter took in another deep breath. She prayed the gatekeeper that was working today or on this shift was not the one she dreaded. He was not a mean gatekeeper, this one was odd, perverted, foul mouthed, and a little screwy in the head. If the rumors were correct this single gatekeeper had his way with almost every warrior, knight, and adventurer who came his way. The rest ran off freaked out and in search for a different gatekeeper who only took a toll, a trinket, food, wine, a riddle, a game, and sometimes a duel. Those she can handle herself, him she felt like she could not handle him. All the stories about him spun around in her head causing her to buckle down on the inside and freeze where she stood. Not a single one of them called it rape because he was too screwed up.

She punched herself in the arm to get herself out of this state of mind. Jutting her chest up she grabbed her sword and arms herself with it. On the saddle was a helmet she was given by the Praetor at the fort who wished her luck while mocking the area's superstitions. Hillda did not believe in anything unless she saw it for herself. She was not the religious type, nor the superstitious type, but a warrior. Since she was thirteen she sought the life as a Knight or at least a skilled swordsman. Due to her father's reputation she learned from pirates, mercenaries, adventurers, rangers, and the infamous outlaw himself, The Ruthless Adder. Her train of thought was disrupted by a loud voice that greeted her.

"Oh hi there!" the voice said loudly giving her a startle. It sounded like a cross between a raspy voice, and that of a foreigner or some growl in the voice. "Have you come to enter the gate?"

"Yes I have come to enter the gate, Gatekeeper!" Hillda replied to the loud gatekeeper. She approached the gate to find a figure sitting on the ground wearing nothing but a hooded robe. The figure was covered from head to toe. She had no way to tell if he was naked under there.

"Then you must tickle my sides!" the gatekeeper said with a laugh.

"Make you laugh?" she asked the gatekeeper. Hillda had other ideas of what he wanted her to tickle.

"You, you must...must..." the gatekeeper was about to continue but she cut him off.

"NO! Absolutely not gatekeeper!" she snapped at him while trying to keep herself calm and collective in this situation. She wondered if he was joking and was just trying to get her to go away.

"You did not let me finish my dear hero." The gatekeeper said as he looked up to see who he was speaking to. When he lifted up his head to face her his eyes lit up with excitement.

"Oooooo oho! We have a pretty face come our way! A lot of things must have had you for fun!" the gatekeeper said with a hint of mock in his voice. He laughed some more.

"Well, uh wait NO! Darn you sir no I that is strictly private! You sick sick man it is none of your beeswax who I have been with!" Hillda was about to go for her sword feeling anger build up inside her. She was in no way a whore, slut, or a prostitute. However she did engage in some acts of the flesh.

"Let us look at those things eh! Bouncing, bouncing, bouncing!" the gatekeeper laughed some more.

"OH HOW DARE YOU! I AM A WARRIOR NOT SOME DUMB BAR WENCH WHO TAKES SUCH FOUL LANGUAGE AS A COMPLIMENT!" she was red in the face and ready to chop his head off. Something held her back.

"Don't hold back honey buns you've got what it takes to please a king! That body of yours is a fine sweet for the eyes." the gatekeeper said now sticking his tongue out at her.

She was not going to take this anymore. Hillda marched up to the gatekeeper with her hand on the hilt of her blade. Rage had built up inside her to the boiling point. This warrior was going to cut this gatekeeper to pieces if he did not stop.

"If you don't stop I'll chop that manhood of yours off!" she threatened.

"Never should have mentioned the shaft." the gatekeeper said with a big smile and a giggle. He blew her a kiss and blew it towards her. His breath reached her and entered her nostrils. A fowl stench wafted around her face. She felt like vomiting as the stench of his breath churned her stomach. Hillda ran back to her horse.

"Hey I thought you wanted to enter the gate!" the gatekeeper shouted at her. Hillda turned around expecting him to be in the nude and playing with himself. To her very fortune he did neither of those things. He was right she did desire to go inside that gate. Turning around Hillda regained her composure feeling the rage subside a little.

"Um, yes I do." she replied.

"Then I pronounce us man and wife, master and slave according to pecking order." the gatekeeper said.

"No no we are not married you vile creep!" she yelled at him feeling her rage return.

"Off you go then." the gatekeeper responded.

"Wait what?" she asked feeling confused.

"Off you go lass." the gatekeeper said as he opened the gate.

Hillda shook off the confusion and just rushed to the gate before the gatekeeper changed his mind. As she passed the gatekeeper sat back down and grabbed her back the knee. She turned to strike him but he stopped her. Hillda thought he was actually going to rape her this time.

"You endured me longer than anyone. Go ahead you have earned it." the gatekeeper said to her then let go of her. 

A Fiery Night

Inside the city of more than one hundred eighty thousand one man sat on his balcony at night. Everyone else was asleep except for him, night watch, guards on patrol, cats, rats, dogs barking, young couples flirting or making love, and of course thieves. He listened to the noise as no one would as if it were music to his ears. Each weekend he would sit on this balcony until dawn. There was nothing more entertaining than watching a thief or assassin sneak in through the night. Every time he looked out on his balcony he would always see a figure in the dark among the alleyways, and on top of the buildings. Whenever he saw he would smile and take a puff of his pipe.

It did not matter how light these thieves, or assassins were on their feet someone would always call them out. To him it was a game calling out to a criminal or a nearby watch or guard. He was not alone in calling out to the criminals or the guards and watch. Every weekend he would hear other voices shouting out to these lurkers. They would either run, try to hide or yell back depending on how close they were to them and the authorities. All those situations gave him and the shouters a good laugh. One some weekends they would get yelled at by neighbors, guards, the watch or any one else roaming the streets. It often turned into arguments then shouting matches then arguments again until one of them was silenced.

To keep track of things he decided to record all the times there was a thief, or assassin called out, an argument, and a shouting match. On the weekdays he would roam the streets getting looks, and glares from people who knew when he was yelling in the night. As he walked through the streets he was surprised to see no one had attacked him since he began three years ago. It made him feel invincible and immune. The authorities loved whoever called out the thieves and assassins. Every week one of these lurkers are caught they would bring a gift to the one who calls them out. Such a gift would be a piece of meat one week, a bottle of fine wine, some bag of coin, shoes, clothing, and some tobacco weed.

He received other gifts including a pie or a kiss from a local gal. In his newest chair he spied a figure jumping from rooftop to rooftop. From the way the figure moved he appeared to be an expert acrobat from a carnival who had become a master. The crime-spotter watched with interest while puffing away at his pipe. As he watched something else caught his attention. Well past the city walls he saw lights appearing in the distance. Many lights appeared in the dark night. He stood up feeling perplexed at what he was witnessing. Who was lighting this many fires at this time of night. Dozens of small fire balls lifted up from the ground as if they were hurled or launched. The fire balls soared into the air lighting the night sky followed by even more fire balls. Scores upon scores of fire balls light the night sky with an orange red glow. His jaw dropped at the sight of many fireballs crashing down on his own city.

The fireballs smashed into the streets, hit multiple structures and homes. Fire began to spread as more fireballs were launched at his city. Each flaming ball of death came crashing into the city causing fires to rise, panic as people screamed with fear. People ran out of their homes to put the fires out while some came out of their house on fire. Guards, and the Watch raced to the gate as the bells rang from the churches signalling their city was under siege. No one was safe during a siege like this. Especially when the ones laying siege sent fire balls of death down upon your settlement. He had seen this before when he was younger in another city. That was when he was just a small boy of six years old. Most of his family had already passed on or lived somewhere else. Memories of that day never left him. Tonight only reminded him that nightmare no little boy should witness. As the fireballs rained down on this city he left the balcony to help put out the fires.

Outside of his home, which was an apartment complex he witnessed the horrors of a siege. Fire balls came down like an endless wave. People screamed with fear, others ran for their lives, some cowered against the walls, many of them raced to get water to put out the fires. There were those unfortunate souls who were hit by the flaming balls. Several rolled down the streets setting fire to some buildings, objects, and rolling over bystanders. He picked up a bucket when one hit the ground next to him exploding. Flames and shrapnel hit him along with the blast. The man was pushed back and slammed against a wall. Everything went dark as he was knocked unconscious. In an uncomfortable position he lay there until he was rudely awaken with a jab in the rib. As he opened his eyes he saw the attackers of his city and finally entered. The two attackers grabbed him as his hearing came back. Sounds of battle could be heard just feet from his location. Most of the city guard, watch and militia were fighting to defend the rest of the city. 

A Dead Language Discovered

Napoleon's campaign in Egypt began in 1798 over his interests in education, art and culture. In this campaign Napoleon faced the Mamluks, Arabs and the Turks with his armies. His armies pressed he advance against these three forces earning victories over the Pyramids, and at Aboukir. Under the command of Kleber, and Reyner part of his armies pushed into Palestine. Pushing further into the middle east was not the job of his army of scholars. Outside the town of Rosetta north of Alexandria a team of soldiers and scholars searched for artifacts of Egypt's ancient past. For days and weeks they searched the desert for anything that was remotely ancient or hinted at clues to the ancient culture that existed over two thousand years ago.

To them, the scholars and soldiers who yearned for this knowledge it was an honor. Many of them wanted to find the pieces of the ancient culture they heard about or read in books that were recorded from older records. Most of those were that of Roman scrolls, and Greek scrolls from the Days of Alexander the Great. One soldier rode his camel through the desert not too far away from the town of Rosetta. Pierre Bouchard, a soldier in Napoleon's Army scanned the landscape in search of anything out of the ordinary. Anything that was not part of the landscape or well carved into the stone as a statue, or the piece of an ancient structure long forgotten in sand and time.

Upon his camel Bouchard made serpentine patterns in the sand searching for something in the area. For nearly an hour of searching his eyes caught something black in the sands. Urging his camel forward he raced up to this object. Not giving a damn about whether his camel would stay put or budge to move when he tried to remount Bouchard dismounted. He jumped down from the camel to uncover whatever this was. Looking around it was clear this was not part of the landscape. Bouchard used his hands to uncover this black object to reveal it was a piece of basalt four feet long and two and a half feet wide. On it were markings that must have been some ancient language. These markings appeared to be a written language of some sort. At closer look it appeared there were three different sets of languages. Well aware of his orders he turned around to call his fellow Frenchmen and soldiers with the scholars. Bouchard turned around to find a claw on the basalt stone.

A large cat or lion looking creature with a human's face had placed a paw over the basalt stone. It stared at him with its cat like eyes. This lion creature drummed its other paw with a more curious look than an angered one. Bouchard raised a pistol to fire but it was knocked out of his hands by a tail. Whatever this lion creature was it was certainly intelligent and well aware of his intentions. However it did not kill him or even swat him just his weapon. Bouchard backed away horrified that a large beast laid claim over the large basalt stone.

"Well you have found something of mine." the creature spoke with a feminine voice. Bouchard soiled himself when the beast spoke to him.

"I am curious are you here to steal my treasures or the knowledge within this basalt stone?" The beast asked Bouchard in broken French. Bouchard said nothing in response while he tried to recover from soiling himself.

"For months I have watched your people these Frenchmen under a Napoleon Bonaparte? I have even followed you since you came to Alexandria. Following your people and listening to them has allowed me to pick up some of your speech." the large feline said to Bouchard despite him not responding to her.

"It....it...it is knowledge the G-g-great Napoleon seeks!" he said aloud.

"Very well then. If you answer this question or if any of your friends answer correctly then you can have this stone. I will be fair with you since you seem more interested in preserving than destroying this lands ancient past." She said offering a deal to the Frenchman.

Bouchard turned around to find ten soldiers, and five scholars gazing at this large lion looking beast before them. Each one dismounted from their camel. None of them drew their weapon as they saw no harm came to Bouchard at all. One of the scholars approached the large feline cat whose gaze turned one him. He nearly soiled himself when the beast turned her attention to him.

"What are you I mean who are you?" He asked in Arabic.

"My name is Zuponef the Sphinx. Answer this question and you shall receive this stone as a reward." She said challenging the scholars. Each one agreed to this challenge showing their eagerness to have this stone.

"Who traversed the deserts, was once a prince, banished himself, and returned to bring laws? There that should be a suffice question for you." Zuponef gave her question to the scholars and french soldiers.

Everyone of them were stumped by this question. They huddled together trying to figure out who this person was that the Spinx referred to. Bouchard sat down on the sand trying to think. He looked at the desert and thought of Egypt. Something about the question hinted at the Bible. Could it be she referred to a Messenger of God? Moses was banished and wandered the deserts, he was also a Prince of Egypt while the Hebrews were in Egypt.

"Moses?" He blurted out loud. He looked at the beast who claimed to be Zuponef.

"You are correct." she answered. Zuponef pushed the basalt stone with the ancient carvings over to him. He looked down at the prize he had just won. He looked up to thank this so called Sphinx. The large lion like creature had disappeared into the desert. 

Negotiating to Escape

"Lylla, Lylla, Lylla when will you LEARN?" Eva berated her with a mocking grin and a gun pointed at her ship.

"There is plenty for you, your men, and myself!" Lylla proclaimed to the Privateer-Corsair. She let out a nervous laugh as a bead of sweat came down her forehead.

"Pfff ha ha ha ha ha! Lylla you know every time you find something this big I will always be there or someone else will be there to take it from you. Unless through sheer luck you happened to evade that situation." Eva stated after laughing. Her own crew of Corsairs, and Privateers who became corsairs laughed as well.

"I was just going to bring this treasure to the nearest Lord, no a Sultan of the  Bazul Oasis." She replied to Eva hoping she would buy that.

"Huh, the Sultan of the Bazul Oasis? Hmmm I have had the pleasure of talking to his skeleton just last year. You cannot fool me Lylla Loving Bones I know you keeping that treasure to yourself and your band of misfit adventurers! Hand it over." Eva saw through the lies Lylla was trying to pull in order to get out of this.

"Can't we just make a deal-" Lylla tried to speak but was cut off by a loud voice through a loud megaphone.

"DO NOT MOVE PIRATE SCUM! VICEROYALTY BARTOLO DE TAVIRA HAS CLAIMED THIS TREASURE IN THE NAME OF THE EMPEROR ALEXANDRE III OF HOUSE RIBERO!"  the voice demanded from both vessels, one full of corsairs and the other full of adventurers ready to leave at any given moment.

Both Lylla and Eva looked up to see a huge Galleon that must have been crewed by 177 soldiers/sailors and garrisoned with an additional 84 drafted auxiliary troops from the Ribero Empire. It almost came in between them , but had to stop since there was little to no room for it. On its deck hundreds of sailors, and soldiers stood armed with guns, swords, other melee weapons, and prepared to board both vessels. The officers stood at the vessel's bow dressed in that orange, green, and red uniforms. All the soldiers either wore green uniforms with cuirasses over them or the orange uniforms. Most of the soldiers wore either a Morion helmet, or tricorne hat. The rest wore caps, and other hats suitable for airship sailing.

"Greetings to you oh great soldiers of his Majesty I mean Divine Monarch the Great Alexandre III!" Lylla said as charmingly as possible while speaking loudly for them to hear. She hoped someone else would arrive such as the Carvetian Empire, the Lexurns, or that newly formed Central Trading Union.

"WHO ARE YOU? STATE YOUR NAMES WHO ARE YOUR CAPTAINS SENORITA?" the officer with the megaphone asked.

"My name is Lylla Loving Bones Captain of the Crowned Sword also known as Delusional Heck! I am only a female adventurer seeking fortunes where ever she may find them!" Lylla said forcing herself to spill out the truth to a group of male officers of the Ribero Crown.

"Senorita you are on a ship seeking fortunes like a common back alley thief and dirty explorer? Madam you must have lost your way while becoming a lady." the officer replied sounding a little more softer this time. His attention turned to Eva's ship. Eva bowed to them revealing her cleavage to the well dressed men of the Ribero Crown.

"Eva Xander Captain of her Majesty's Navy Queen Olivia IV of Carvetia. My ship is the Black Star's Demon. Perhaps you have heard of it?" Eva introduced herself with another bow to these fine Celberian gentlemen.

"Senoritas you both are Captains of your ships. Uh eh Perhaps you two shall dine with us and other Admirals of the Celberian Navy. It may be suitable for women of your stature to delve in the life of a Lady or a Nobles's lifestyle." the one with the megaphone spoke with a hint of nervousness in his voice. He nearly stammered when he noticed he was speaking to women. Lylla eyed him closely noticing he wiped away sweat from his brow.

"I believe that will not happen!" Eva spat out but seemed to take the words back. She pondered for a moment then something hit her. "We were just on our way out of here. You see Captain Lylla and I were just discussing terms of one ship following the other out of this dreadful wasteland!"

"Senorita Xander we must insist on our invitation to you and Madam Lylla. Both of you have been invited to dine with us." the other officer replied turning Eva's offer down. Two more Galleons appeared in the scene each one full of Celberian sailors and soldiers. Both ships flanked the Delusional Heck and the Black Star's Demon.

"Very well then we shall take your invitation only if our ships and crew are spared and pardoned." Lylla replied for Xander who was flabbergasted and could not speak. She watched Eva gulp before accepting this invitation to dine with the Admirals and Captains. Eva turned to Lylla's direction and gave her a loathing glare. It was apparently not her plan or on her agenda. She had dragged her own rival into a night of dining with a supposed enemy. That is if these men knew who they really were and they had bounties on their heads. 

Restored to the Throne

On his throne the King of three titles and four ranks studied the turncoat leader. For nearly thirty years his world had been under reign under a Dictator who was elected. A thousand years of kings, queens, monarchs, emperors, and empresses was too much for his family to bear. Most of the subjects grew tired of the doctrines, rules, regulations, and strict exclusions that were hardly enforced. In his seat the restored Monarch, King of the Tail Peoples, and High Lord of the Half-Elves allowed his own tail to move freely. Before the whole court of Nobles, Knights, Lords, Barons, Counts, Aristocrats who were allowed in, Renowned Warriors, and those Guardians who went to other worlds to watch their soldiers on other earths was a tall Death Warrior.

This Death Warrior once served an Oligarchy of villains, mad scientists, evil wizards, and overlords who ruled over countless demons, mutants, and fowl minions. For decades they had been in open conflict with this Oligarchy who sought to rule the universe in their image. This turncoat was a dark elf who brought his whole clan to join his restored monarchy's armies. It was just this morning on of this well known Guardians and General of the Black Coats came home with three strange jobs to three separate agencies for a country in another world. To him it seemed strange there was a world full of humans who were divided by borders and it was just recently that two powers vying for leadership ended their "Cold War" with each other. His favored Guardian brought home with him a wooden tiger some child gave to him after that child met him. What was more strange was that one child stabbed a scientist's high ranking experiment with just a pencil.

His attention was return to the dark elf who bowed so low that his nose nearly touched the floor. He congratulated him on restoring the Monarchy to their world. This Clan Leader presented a scimitar forged in the underworld that is home of the dark elves. As King he took the gift with gratitude as was expected of him. His grandmother the former Empress sat next to him muttering advice while the Court Wizard was with his son discussing possible futures on some other world. In a moment he gestured to the Dark Elf and welcomed him to his court hoping to find a suitable area for his people to settle in.

When the Dark Elf was finished, four of his Black Coat Guards came in with a captured prisoner. It was a man he recognized, an evil Mad Doctor who performed cruel experiments on the small folk of their world. He did not wish to think of what kind of experiments were performed on those innocent people. No one should have been treated like a guinea pig or a lab rat or some test subject as those scientists labelled their victims as. One of his own scientists had to be held back by a Guard. He shouted insults and spat at him. The scientist tried his best to hold back tears shouting that this one had ruined his wife forever. Soon others joined in throwing insults and shoes at the scientist. His Black Coat Guards dodged the thrown objects letting them hit the prisoner.

Before any thing else was done he stood up and demanded for silence in his court. His voice was not as booming as it used to be. In the days before his coronation he was the loudest man in the room when he yelled. That was in his youth now he was older, wiser, but wounded. In the heat of battle a large being punched him in the throat a little too hard forcing his voice to weaken over the years. He had to abdicate his throne leaving it to his less interested cousin who mucked things up badly. During his days as the renewed Monarch he had to bring people back under the Kingdom. Much of their own world had been taken over by this dark oligarchy.

In order to show he was strong he had to leave his throne and march up to the mad scientist. He looked mutated, grotesque and scaly from all those experiments. All the mad man did was cackle at the sight of the renewed king. He mocked him for a few moments before the King struck him with both hands. It silenced him for a few moments until he started laughing again saying obscenities. The whole court gasped and  muttered before being silenced again. A decision must be made today. In front of the court was one of the mad scientists who terrorized many worlds with their mutated creations, and allies. Looking at his disgusting scientists the King chose to put this mad man to the stocks, have him pressed with rocks, and drowned. 

A Treasure worth Dying For

Fidgeting with the ancient lock the crew member of a small band of outlandish misfit freebooters did everything he could to get this chest open. His leader, the captain of this small crew of only seventeen sea going adventurers, watched him pick the lock with various tools. It was the only chest they had dug up. However, according to the map and the message there was more than one of these chests. She started out with a smaller band of only five under the command of another Captain with a larger crew. A year went by and her little band became a crew of five to six manning its own small Sloop. She sold the sloop after another year and the crew started to increase in size. With enough money she managed to get a Brig-Schooner that was overused and rendered useless. He was one of the twelve crew members who survived the adventures in the Sloop and witnessed a new life aboard a Schooner.

For nearly half a an hour he picked the lock of this chest they had just dug up. All sixteen of his shipmates watched him work on this older chest. Using the tools such as the Gonzo Hook, and the Diamonds did not do the trick until he twisted both of them different directions. In moments he heard a click followed by the sound of the chest popping open. He jumped backwards to avoid any traps, poisons, gases, and sand that collected inside. His Captain went up to the chest and opened it further letting gold coins, silver coins, ambers, amethysts, rubies, emeralds, and topaz's spill out onto the sand. She put one boot on the open chest unsheathed her short rapier and placed it on one shoulder. In her red striped trousers, knee high boots, leather corset over her blue blouse, and tricorn hat Captain Loving Bones Lylla presented her gift to the crew.

"Let it sink in my darlings you fortunes will be greater once we get the rest out of the ground!" She declared to her crew of only seventeen adventurers who did act like pirates some of the time.

After three years of being chased around the seas she saw it was best to leave pirating and go treasure hunting and even do privateer work from time to time. Her crew bellowed, and cried out with delight before digging in for more of those treasure chests. She sheathed her rapier in its sheath on a belt that was far too big for her. Even though it was big she still managed to wrap it around her waste and wear it. She patted the locksmith of the crew and allowed him to take what had spilled onto the sand. He jumped on it and gathered up whatever his eyes could see that was not in the chest. The two of them watched the rest of the crew climb into the hole they had just dug up. Several minutes passed and they found even more chests that were most likely full of gold, gems, and other valuables.

One by one they hauled the rest of these chests out of the ground. To their greatest surprise they found twelve more chests. Without hesitation Captain Lylla ordered her whole crew to bring their dug up treasure to their ship. Her ship hovered one story above the sand. Using their hovering platforms Lylla's crew managed to bring the chests to their ship before trouble arrived on a Corvette with Privateer colors above the Corsair ones. Her heart sank at the sight of this ship.

"Prepare the ship to leave we cannot hold her back this time!" She said to her first mate. He nodded then bellowed out commands for their small crew to man their stations.

Lylla glared at the Corvette as it swooped around with its port side parallel to her Brig's port side. She saw a crew of nearly eighty or more corsairs who dressed as privateers swinging their weapons ready to board her Brig-Schooner. Standing on the port side was an old rival of hers, Captain Eva the Gorgeous Xander. Eva was that privateer who would go more towards the Corsair side of piracy and raiding and hunt down just about anyone who was on a treasure hunt. Lylla knew who to blame for giving away her location on the vast continent of Endless Beach. Eva grabbed a rope as if she was about to swing over in nothing else but a dark blue corset over a black bra, tight trousers, boots that went to her knees, and naval officer's coat. An eye patch went over one eye, her hair was left to blow in the wind with streaks of red, and blue in light brown hair. For a weapon she was armed with a pistol and a long oriental looking blade that she must have taken from another kingdom in the far east. Her belly was exposed revealing only two scars that hardly ruined her beauty. On her head was a crooked Cocked Hat that looked brand new. It look large on her head to move eyes away from her bust, not that she really cared since she was ruthless at times.

Lylla closed her eyes and thought of a way out of this. She could bargain her way out of this and offer some chests to this Privateer-Corsair Succubus and Vampire. Her crew relied on her for giving them a fair share of the spoils and finds. Yet with that buxom, curvy Corsair of a Succubus now here she had no other choice than to parlay, or negotiate a deal with these Pirating Privateers.

Two Catapults Part 4

Behind this force marched another army of seven thousand Trast soldiers, Militia and conscripts. He looked over at the Muskallans who were starting to divide the camps. The Goblin watched more than seven thousand Muskallans split their army into three forces. Two forces wen sound and west while the third force started marching for the Tamoth and Trast armies. Each one had different banners representing another clan that forged this horde.
 As the Goblin watched he heard hoofbeats riding up to him. He turned around, curious to see who it was. It was the trio of unaffiliated figures he spotted earlier. They raced over to him and threw a bag over him. He felt powerless as the bag was thrown on him. Whoever this trio of bounty hunters were they scooped up the bag with him inside it. All he saw was the inside of the dark bag. Being inside the bag was uncomfortable and the ride was rocky. He bounced around and hit the side of the mount. For some time, they rode before stopping again. He was left on the mount as the trio dismounted to make camp again. While in the bag he heard their voices speak in angry feminine tones. His captors were all female. Not even one of them sounded happy about their own boss. Each one said a negative word or phrase. It was apparent that this trio of figures were hired bounty hunters. They had been hired to act as retrievers.
 None of them spoke very pleasantly about their boss. He tried to speak to them, but was cut off by the trio of women. Moments later the trio of women came down on him with slaps, punches, and kicks. When they were done one of them left food at his feet as they made camp to rest. The Goblin was then tied up with the bag up to his neck. A piece of food was shoved into his mouth. He was left like this for the next four days after being picked up and dropped for camp. He did not get a good look at his captors. While in the bag he only heard their conversations. However he paid little attention to their words on the subject. All he cared about was surviving his captivity. Eventually he would seek a away out of this.
 For several days he plotted to escape. There was hardly anything he could find to use as his hands were tied up and the captors kept sharp objects away from his reach. For an hour and a half this Goblin searched for a way out of this. His plans did not coincide with trio of female bounty hunters. Before he could hatch a good plan the Goblin was picked up again. In the bag the Goblin had to ride on the side of the mount. His hopes of getting out this one was killed. The trio had stopped and took him off the mount he was on. He felt the bag be carried to a building and the door swing open. His captors exchanged words with whoever was at the front door with angry voices. After words were exchanged he could hear them go up some steps. In moments the trio of bounty hunters must have reached their destination and tossed the Goblin out of the bag. He lay on the floor before the very architect behind the horde.
Seated in an armchair was an irritated man in his fifties. His clothing said he was about to go to sleep until he was rudely stirred out of bed. This irritated man was no doubt the main architect behind this entire horde. For several minutes he sat in his arm chair within his own quarters. A well-dressed woman stood at the side of the chair. A lamp was turned on to shed some light in the room.
The Goblin sat up on the floor and begged for a second chance. He explained how the Gontrellans pissed everyone off at the siege. In his own words he explained how things escalated into chaos. Everything that happened spilled out. The architect of this horde just rolled his eyes. He ordered for a cigar to be prepared and lit. Whoever the woman was did as he asked her as if a wife does for a husband. Holding the cigar in hand the architect stood up and approached the now scared Goblin. He puffed a few times before blowing a ring into the Goblin’s face. Without hesitation he grabbed the Goblin by the throat and squeezes to force his mouth open. He shoved the cigar into the Goblin’s left eye then his tongue. The Goblin was forced to eat the cigar whole and swallow it. His good eye ogled the woman who stood next to the armchair. She did not even look him the eye as she was disgusted by something. His tongue was burned, and he could speak or see out of one eye. The architect picked him up by the throat and dragged over to the stairs where he was thrown over the railing.
 

The Day of Declaration

When the manuscript was read aloud and finished the gathered crowds cheered with joy. An atmosphere of overwhelming happiness, excitement, and confidence. Bells rang in every church as the news spread across the city. It would not be long before the rest of the colonies celebrated this day. People jumped with joy, and glee. Others danced in harmony. Many men fired their firearms in the air regardless of wasted gunpowder. Flags and handkerchiefs were waved all over the streets. A sense of freedom rose up in the crowd as they declared their actions of breaking the chains of their tyrant across the sea. The festivities continued into the night as fireworks shot into the night sky. Hundreds if not thousands of man and women filled the taverns, and streets drinking the fine brews away. It was on this day the colonies declared themselves an independent nation. 

Act Like A Man

In his tent he laid on his cot with his three other fire members who shared a resemblance in this vast army made up of all walks of life. He was the youngest of thirteen children. Their mother was a well known, and famous Bard, Musician, and Beast Tracker. Raising thirteen children alone was a hefty burden. Yet she managed with help from the Taverns, Patrons, Travelling Merchants, Warriors, some Soldiers, and unfortunately those Mercenary Types or Killers. One of this eldest brothers left the family for a life in the Navy until he showed up on the news as a Pirate. It broke his mother's heard to see a son of hers go to the pirate's way of life.

His older brother then became a beast hunter or Monster Slayer under the wing of a famous Superhuman on their planet. Most of their race had tails likes like cats or monkeys while others did not have one at all. Those Superhuman beings had far more strength than most humanoids or life forms. Another brother was taken in as a Squire to a Knight who served the King well. He left for a crusade on the outer rim territories. His sisters were in between all the boys of the family. Their father rarely even saw them except twice a year. All of the girls joined the court as the entertainment, minstrels, maids, and lady in waiting.

Years passed then his two other brothers left the family one went off to join this secret army who are said to be copies of a man who saved their people. Many people believed this army of look a likes were a joke and that it was simply because they all had shaven faces. Each of them was a paratrooper of some sort or a ranger while others were troopers to the crown. As he cleaned the tavern-inn which his mother opened up one of this brothers came home as a Commanding Officer. He had grown larger because his experiences in the war zones. What really hurt his mother was that the other one did not come home like he said. He became an assassin-rogue. Out of rage she banned that one from coming as well. The other brother was forced to stay and so was he. For the next couple of years they stayed to help with their mother receiving visits from the Monster -Slayer, the Knight, and the Commander.

When word got out that a large horde had amassed once again. All able bodied men and available women were summoned. In tears his mother fought to save her remaining children from the horrors of war and from leaving the family. Against her wishes they were conscripted. His other brother was placed in that top secret army of copies or look a likes. While he was placed under the conscripted army. This army was consisted of the lowest of the low. Gathered from all corners, nations, cities, and walks of life. Much like his hero he marched with these wretches, and vermin of society. He discovered he was not the only one conscripted.

While in his tent he heard the drums pounding summoning the conscripts to their formations. Battle was upon them. Every one of them marshaled out of their tents into formations. Under the tune of the old fife and drum they marched forward armed with bolt action rifles and outdated uniforms of black and white. Although they did not carried their rifles the way most armies did the conscripts pressed on the march to find a small force of defenders. Seeing the defenders fighting their hardest to keep this horde at bay the commanders ordered for the entire regiment to flank the horde of strange creatures, mutants, and other fowl creatures.

For him it was time to face his fears. Each night he shirked outdoor duties at night. He was scared get eaten alive by those monsters he heard about. As he loaded his rifles he aimed and fired hoping that would keep the monsters away. For several rounds he loaded and fired until the horde was fast approaching them. He shook in his boots nearly wetting himself at the sight of this army. He had heard stories that scared him to the bone. Then a voice behind him said '"Act like a man boy! Your Kingdom needs you!" Out of curiosity he turned around to see it was another well known hero. It was that boy who saved their world time and time again. He was man now with a stern face, a cropped beard and an aura that could kill. This man was called a Dragon much like the Impaler.

"Grab your balls men, these beasts are nothing! They threaten to murder and rape their victims in order to have their way. Bah! Kill them and take no prisoners!" the man said riding what appeared to be a large feline steed.

As preposterous as it seemed for someone to be riding a feline as a mount this Dragon was not to be mocked. He slapped a Lieutenant across the face for being a typical dog that she was. This infamous Dragon grabbed the command while their commander was being eaten after leading a charge.

"Bayonets!" the man roared.

Feeling the courage rise up in him the youngest son of a Bardess fixed his bayonet and prepared to charge into the ranks of the fowl horde that ravaged their world for centuries. He was finally going to act like a man.